July 17, 2012 1 Comment
An outcry for help….
I believe that this has been coming on for a while but when my immune system lowered during my pregnancy, it started taking over my body. And I feel alone and like nobody believes that anything is wrong with me.
It started in my face with the feeling that I had glass or sand under my skin. I had some issues with dizziness and had blacked out on pavement and cut my chin badly and assumed that it was from that. But during the last trimester of my pregnancy my fatigue had become horrible and I continued having the skin problems. After the birth of my beautiful baby boy I kept going downhill. I became disconnected from life and not myself. I assumed eventually that I had post partum depression and got put on an antidepressant. My vision started becoming blurry and my head was in a cloud. In addition I had restless legs and bad aches in them, swelling, and numbness and tingling that would come and go. I scrubbed my face with salt trying to bring this sharpness out of my skin and after rinsing that day my tweezers became attached to me at all times. It hasn’t stopped and it has spread from my face to my legs and now my arms and hands. The more I try to remove the more it grows. Sand like grannuals that crunch between tweezers and even are in my blood.
Long strings of skin that only pull from one direction and curl up. Flat flake like sharp peices and ooze that hardens on my skin. Now blue fibers always everywhere even on my son which I breastfed for a few months which worries me now so bad it makes me sick. Biting and crawling feelings and the hair on my head has become dry and lifelike. The ends move around my face like they are the antennae of an insect.
No family support…
My husband is sick of my obsessive search for an answer and my collecting of specimens every day all day. Even after reading of how doctors are treating people I had to give it a try. He pushed my samples around with a q-tip and had a reason for it all, even the new thing coming from me, purplish fusia hexagon sparkles. He took some blood and gave me a new antidepressant and sent me on my way. I just want someone to believe me. I’m not crazy. I am not lazy, the life is being sucked out of me and I am becoming something that’s not me. My son is the only reason I go on and I just know there’s more to come. And what if I gave it to him? It makes me sick. Someone please tell me that I am like you and I’m not alone.
You are not alone. You are NOT crazy. It will harden you and you will find some comforts to make things easier. I was scared when really bad off for my grand kids. Now I have a lot of this under control like a hand full hear. We are not all the way out of the woods, but tons easier then when it hit full force. I use to pray for God to kill me every day I had so many bugs living on me and different kinds and different stages. That the bugs were worse then the sand and specks and fuzz and pieces of rice that would come off me through out the day.
If for any reason your baby gets this. I want you to know that they seem to bounce back quicker when given the right treatment. Usually GMO free food, No soy, no fake sugars. As organic as you can find. That would also include soaps and other baby products. That will help protect him and keep it low if he does get this. I feel so bad for you.
I want to tell you that when I first got hit full force 3 years ago. I was so scared that too much of anything would just bring me down. So when looking for answers try to pick out simple things you can change right away and then start adding to that. Go at your own pace. The big reason also is that more stress will make you sicker.
The lady friend who helped me knew this and would only give me instructions in steps so I would not just get so overwhelmed and just quit. Instead I stayed with it, because I did not realize just how much I was in for.
As for the hubby. Been through some of that like many others here. I had to learn how to limit what I said but he did always help me with task when I asked. Even the ones that were useless to him and he complained, but he realized if it gave me peace of mind then it was worth putting up with.
Oh sweet girl… no, you are NOT alone and you’ve found a beautiful family here. I’ve had morgs for almost 9 yrs now… but I can tell you it CAN be controlled. I was exactly where you are for so many years, but once I decided it was time to take back the controls and start living my life again (I’d been a total recluse for 6 yrs) things started to change for me. I stopped scoping, I stopped picking and pulling, and I stopped focusing on this thing by not giving it the attention I was giving it 24/7. Do I still feel the sensations today? Yes, but they’ve become weaker and weaker with time to where it’s easy for me to ignore it now. In my experience, the more you pick at it, the more it replicates. The less attention you give it tho, the weaker it WILL become. Rise above it and be positive and happy and raise your baby boy like there’s no tomorrow. No negativity honey… and no fear. Those are what morgs thrives on… so even tho I know all the feelings you’re experiencing right now, please do everything you can to not allow it to take over. You can do it shy… have faith and be the strong compassionate person I know you are. You’re gonna be ok… but you have to believe that and get into the right mind set by throwing any kind of negativity and fear right out the window. We’re here for you tho no matter what… we’re here to help you make it thru. Also know that once you do get into a positive mind set… your body will have a much better chance of balancing out again. It happened for me… and I know it can happen for you too.
the GOOD NEWS
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